Our city, Phoenix, is probably one of the more active cities in the nation when it comes to WMD preparedness.  We have a large-scale event every year involving the National Guard, police and fire department.  It’s a building block of teams working with one another in case something like this hits the valley.  Also, each Phoenix officer now has personal protective equipment in their car that they carry with them at al times.  They receive training every year and get fit tested on their gas masks once a year as well.  I always pick up something new at each WMD class I go to.  There is so much to learn, biological, radiological and nuclear.  I don’t know if an event will ever take place here, but I do want to be prepared.  It’s easy to bury our heads in the sand and say it will never happen in Phoenix but you never know. 

I have never had to shoot anyone or use my gun on a person.  Most officers don’t during their career but it is a tool officers need to train with.  That’s why I went to handgun school.  I try to keep up with my skills because this gun could save my life someday.

I know I have been scared. Whether we choose to admit it or not, we all get scared sometimes.  I don’t really scare easily, but when a shot rings out, and you don’t know who fired it or where it’s headed, you can’t help but fear for your life or the lives of your teammates.  The last thing you want to hear on your radio is, “I’ve been shot.”  That feeling of fear and helplessness is enough to make even the strongest tremble.  And the worst part is that all you can do is wait, and hope.

I constantly battle with my weight.  When I weighed 130 lbs I wished I were 120 lbs again.  When I weighed 140 I wished I were 130 again. And now I am 150 lbs and wish I were anything but 150 lbs.  I don’t think I can or will ever be satisfied with my weight.  I have always wished I were thin but never have been.  The guys at work know this is a weakness of mine and constantly tease me about my weight.  I am like everyone else and I have tried every diet there is.  I love food, and to tell you the truth I really don’t eat right.  My only friend in this battle is running.  I run not only keep up with the physical fitness standards, but also to maintain and keep my sanity with my weight.  If only I could have a chef that cooked healthy meals and a personal trainer.  I’m not really that needy though.  I’d gladly accept a chef that is also a personal trainer.